STAYING CENTERED IN DEVELOPING THE ADULT EGO STATE #2

 "Functioning In The Positive Triune Ego State Personality" (2)

TA's :Theory Of Personality Design
Positive Ego State Recognition And Development

Evaluate Yourself As A Whole Person

The Transactional Analysis clinical description of each Ego State is Parent, Adult, and Child. Transactional Analysis also teaches that the three Ego States exist within each individual and that each Ego State has its own distinct personality, can be talked to, observed in action, and is readily identifiable to any trained observer. TA teaches that we think, feel, and make value judgments from each one of the Ego States.

As a Christian counselor I take the non-clinical liberty to also refer to the Parent Ego State as the Mind, the Adult Ego State as the Spirit, and the Child Ego State as the Body because I have found that this reference really helps individuals better understand the TA clinical descriptions of the Parent, Adult, and Child. I have found through some 35 + years of counseling and therapy that God, by deliberate design, has reduplicated His Trinitarian character as Father, Jesus the Son, and the Holy Spirit in creating us with a Trinitarian personality as well. It is my personal experience, and my observed experience in many others over these 35+ years, that His purpose in doing so is to show us that the more we participate and live in the harmony and symphony of His Trinitarian and supernatural presence, the more our Trinitarian personality design is able to function in harmony within each one of us as well.

Identify the balanced positive (+) whole person God DESIGNED you to be in Parent/Mind, Adult/Spirit, and Child/Body, and any negatives (-) that are keeping you from being that whole person. We are to practice the skill of starving the negatives and feeding the positives because what we feed grows and what we starve dies.


The Parent Ego State – the Mind

The positive Nurturing Parent (+) = giving appropriate physical permission and affection toward others. “gentle hug, touch”

The negative Nurturing Parent (-) = giving physical attention to control, or manipulate others. “smothering”

The positive Critical Parent (+) = constructive criticism to protect, or direct away from harm or danger. “you might want to consider”

The negative Critical Parent (-) = negative and degrading criticism to overemphasize in order to control through fear, suspicion, or distrust. “how stupid can you be”


The Adult Ego State – the Spirit

The Investigator (Adult/Spirit) (+) = present moment oriented, flexible and open to change, takes time to listen, ask questions and investigates in order to gather current available information before making decisions.

The Little Boy In the Man and Little Girl In The Woman (Adult/Spirit) (+) = willingness to take risks and develop intimacy, focus on developing and demonstrating character and integrity.


The Child Ego State – the Body

The positive Natural Child (+) = spontaneous, curious, likes to explore, creative, able to balance work and play, able to laugh, cry, and trust.

The negative Natural Child (-) = follows every whim with little restraint, explores without consideration for safety, self-centered and inconsiderate of others, co-dependency/narcissistic.

The positive Adaptive Child (+) = sorts through past parental expectations and follows only those relevant to moving forward as a unique individual. Accepts the importance of certain rules and boundaries.

The negative Adaptive Child (-) = replays patterns of behavior no longer appropriate for adult daily situations, anxious, unable to rest, excessive emphasis on pleasing others and performance orientation.

TA’S “TRIUNE THEORY OF PERSONALITY”

And The Observation Of Behavior

Observation of behavior is the most common way to determine which Ego State and (+) or (-) a person is operating in at any one time. Observing behavior includes observing words, tone of voice, gestures, postures, and facial expressions. Remember that each ego state has its own separate personality, can be talked to, and observed in action. Therefore, we do not oversimplify by saying, “when I am thinking, I am in my Adult ego state, when I am feeling, I am in my Child ego state, or when I am making value judgments, I am in my Parent ego state”!!!

“The goal in Transactional Analysis is to facilitate the whole person
by strengthening the positives and starving the negatives.
Practicing the positive and starving the negative
 is the best way to personally experience transformational change     and demonstrate change to others.”    Adra Lovley, Jr.